A lot of people like to attack Tottenham. They like it because it's easy: anyone can have a good chance against Spurs and recently that was extended to an unlikely source. Hugo Lloris was one of them and even he was up for a ping.
The dig was pushed into the pages of his new book and focused on Daniel Levy. It was actually a cheap hit, based on a gesture that backfired before the 2019 Champions League final against Liverpool, when the chairman presented each of his players with a luxury watch. The crime, such as it was, was caused by a word written on the back: “Finalist.”
“Who would do something like this at a time like this?” Lloris wrote. “I'm still not over it, and I'm not alone.
'I have a lot of respect for the man, but there are things he is just not sensitive to. As beautiful as the watch is, I have never worn it. With such an engraving, Levy could not have been surprised if we were already 1-0 behind after a few minutes.'
Drawing a line between a watch and a questionable penalty after 106 seconds was a bit tricky. Crazy even, and Lloris is not typically a crazy man. But it was always going to be a point that found an audience, because it played into Tottenham's old theme, without the right stuff.
I've never had much use for the term 'Spursy'; it doesn't have the humor of its cousin, 'Dr. Tottenham'. As in: Dr. Tottenham will see you now and take away all your problems. They gave Palace a first win of the season and provided the same relief for Ipswich. They face Manchester City next and the expectation will be that Pep Guardiola will perform a similar service in times of need.
When I think of Tottenham I think of my cousin, a great boy. He can go through the names and nuances of their team and probably recite the birthdays without breathing – he's at that sweet stage of the obsession arc. But he knows the trick now, so when they dominated Leicester on the opening day and left with a draw, he messaged me: 'Classic Spurs.' He is eleven years old and sometimes my sister blames herself for what has been imposed on him.
But he is very much pro-Ange and that's nice because I often think Postecoglou is the most fascinating manager in the division.
I wrote in this space towards the end of last season about the beautiful madness of Postecoglou and somewhat facetiously compared him to one of those preachers who demonstrate their faith with rattlesnakes. The point was about knowing the dangers of believing too much in an ideology, because you can only get bitten so many times.
It's just over a year since he took Tottenham to the top of the Premier League and introduced us to the style that was so daring and intoxicating before it started to look so flawed. If they come out of this international breakthrough they will be tenth and we are not talking about a dip or a break after the euro.
If we were to examine the last 38 league games, only four clubs of the 17 that retained their place in the division have lost more than the 16 that Postecoglou's Tottenham surrendered and their 56 points in that period is good for 10th. In that calculation, they would be significantly closer to the bottom three than the top three; Bournemouth have one point more.
It's not a real ranking, but it's a real funk.
Ultimately, just providing more entertainment than Antonio Conte won't be enough, and we may already be there. To listen to the rather irate fan who turned on talkSPORT last weekend, Postecoglou 'couldn't motivate a can of tuna'.
You may struggle with the images, but you can understand the frustrations – a team that packed United at Old Trafford, beat Manchester City in the Carabao Cup and put four points on Aston Villa also lost to Ipswich and Palace and took nothing from a 2-0 lead at Brighton.
It is a side that you can enjoy, but that you do not trust. A side that takes a nice walk through the field, but leaves the house unlocked forever. A team that routinely concedes the first goal in matches. A team that is still one of the worst when it comes to defending set pieces. A side without a plan B, but plan A could only really work if Son Heung-min got closer to his brilliant peak and Harry Kane was replaced by a truly elite finisher.
And so you have to wonder what Postecoglou is. After City, the next nine league fixtures are Chelsea, Liverpool, Newcastle and Arsenal, as well as the standouts from Fulham and Nottingham Forest. It can be a grind.
But I hope none of this contributes to the usual outcome for a manager. The competition is better for the presence of a stubborn dreamer, a frowning man in a black suit who undertakes to use only the brightest colors in his work.
Postecoglou's image and his tactical vision mimic the contradictions of the club itself: they have the best stadium in football, but an institutional resistance to spending the wages needed to fill it with the best players.
For Levy, the top four will always be the main goal, everything else a bonus, and that's the kind of messaging Lloris was looking for. The summer transfer business backed up what is so often said about them, because when the opportunity arose, with Liverpool and Chelsea changing managers and United panicking to keep Erik Ten Hag, Spurs signed four teenagers and one established striker in Dominic Solanke .
The regret comes from the impression that when opportunities present themselves, Levy sets the template for what follows on the field – he just doesn't convert.
When you look at Tottenham you see a team that is not that far away. At least there are improvements in everything except the numbers that really matter. No one has scored more, only four have conceded fewer. It just usually strikes in the wrong places and at the wrong times.
These are statistics that indicate that the manager's system could be working. That with a higher caliber of staff the madness might have some merit.
But for now, it's easier to enjoy the idea of Postecoglou more than the reality. Those maligned watches indicate how long it is considered durable.
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